The San Diego Affiliate of RESOLVE Announces a

Free Public Educational Meeting

Win a FREE Egg Donor Cycle from Extraordinary Conceptions

Choosing the Right Egg Donor/Surrogate and Related Legal Issues

Featuring Mario Caballero, CEO, Extraordinary Conceptions, LLC and Surrogacy Lawyer Stephanie M. Caballero

Thursday, May 20^th, 6:30PM

Mario of Extraordinary Conceptions will review and discuss how to choose an egg donor and surrogate, what to look for, what to avoid and how to prepare for your cycle with your egg donor and surrogate. Surrogacy Lawyer Stephanie Caballero will discuss the legal aspects of egg donation and surrogacy, including laws and what to look for in a contract — and the importance of a contract.

Doubletree Hotel Del Mar – Cardiff Room
11915 El Camino Real | San Diego, CA 92130-2539

There is NO fee to attend this event. We hope you can make it!

Register for this free event at www.southwest.resolve.org / Events section

When: Saturday 22 May 2010 from 10.00 A.M. TO 1:00 P.M.

Many Gay men are now becoming Dads via surrogacy. There are Surrogacy Agencies in the United States, Canada and India all helping Australian Gay men become fathers.  Altruistic Surrogacy is also now legal in Victoria and some other states of Australia.  This forum with be the fifth held in Melbourne and will be presented by members from Gay Dads Victoria. The free forum will be held in Prahran and provide an opportunity for gay men to find out more about Surrogacy and the options available in Australia and other countries.

Over the years the forum has been the start of the journey to parenthood for many gay men (myself being one of them!).  This is a great opportunity for interested gay singles or couples to have some of their questions answered:

- how does surrogacy work

- how do the surrogacy laws work in the US, Canada, India and Australia

- how do I bring my child back in to Australia

- can anyone do it

- how much does it cost

This will also be an opportunity to meet other Surro Dads and Dads to be and learn more about their journeys.

]]> http://www.extra-conceptions.com/same-sex-marriage-and-surrogates/surrogacy-for-gay-men-%e2%80%93-melbourne-community-forum-%e2%80%93-22-may-2010/feed/ http://www.extra-conceptions.com/same-sex-marriage-and-surrogates/surrogacy-for-gay-men-%e2%80%93-melbourne-community-forum-%e2%80%93-22-may-2010/ http://feeds.g2webmedia.net/~r/ExtraordinaryConceptions/~3/vh9BM5fWcrc/ http://www.extra-conceptions.com/uncategorized/tunisian-teacher-not-pregnant-with-12-babies/#comments Wed, 19 Aug 2009 18:12:30 +0000 Stephanie Caballero http://www.extra-conceptions.com/?p=59 Leave it to the AP to get it right: It appears that the Tunisian women is not pregnant with 12 babies (maybe we have learned something from Octomom after all)! The story did seem “out-there” but after Octomom, you just never know what is possible. I even waited a day to post the story to see if it was actually true.

The AP is reporting that the woman could be experiencing a “phantom pregnancy,” where a woman believes she is pregnant and does experience pregnancy symptoms, such as a swollen abdomen, morning sickness, etc. The condition is rare.

Feel free to comment. Thanks!

Those babies will be lucky if they make it 30 weeks — and survive. Even if they all survive, most likely some if not all of those babies will have multiple health problems that may last a lifetime. While fertility treatments of some kind were used, at this point no one knows if in vitro fertilization (IVF) or artificial insemination (IUI) was the procedure used.

As in the case of Nadya Suleman, the blame rests squarely on the shoulders of the doctor involved. He or she is the one controlling the treatment; however, it is unlikely that he or she will ever have to take any responsibility, either financial or emotional, for the outcome.

What say you?

One would think that cycling around anywhere only two days after surgery requiring anesthesia might not be the best idea, that perhaps a little more R & R would be better, to give the body time to heal. This is the beauty of egg retrieval. While it’s a surgical procedure that is conducted under either light sedation or anesthesia, the procedure itself is so minor that you’ll only spend about 3-4 hours at the surgery center, in most cases. For me, we arrived an hour in advance of my scheduled procedure. About fifteen minutes later my “companion” aka my boyfriend and chauffeur for the day, and I were escorted into a room where my vital signs were checked and the pre-op checklist was reviewed. Did I have any allergies to any drugs? Did I have asthma? Did I have any questions about the procedure? I was put on an IV and sedated fairly promptly, with the anesthesiologist—who took the time to come to my room and chat with me personally for a few minutes before the retrieval—starting the sedation process while I was still in that  room. My surgeon, who I’d met several times already during my injection cycle and physical, came in to greet me and see how I was doing, and by the time I was being wheeled into the operating room, the sedatives were starting to take effect. I waved and smiled at my surgeon, who I could tell was smiling even behind the surgical mask he wore, and the next thing I knew, I woke up.

Waking up from anesthesia is a strange experience, mostly because you don’t feel that any time has passed. I knew I’d feel this way: my last retrieval left me with the same sensation of what happened? The retrieval? So quickly? In reality, an hour or so usually passes, but it still feels like the blink of an eye. After adjusting to this, it was a matter of assessing body trauma, at least as best as I was able to given the loopy state I was in. I felt bloated, and sore, and really crampy. Fortunately, I was in this state because I’d just donated eggs, and I can’t think of a time I’ve been treated more like a queen. My nurse was at my side the very moment my eyes fluttered open, talking to me gently, asking me how I felt, and giving me pain medication. She and the other nurses in the recovery area would check on me every few minutes and when I was hurting again, would give me more pain medication.

This was an interesting situation for me because, as an avid athlete blessed with a generally tolerant immune system who takes nothing stronger than allergy medication and ibuprofen, I’m not one to request pain medication unless I’m in a fair amount of pain. In this instance, my cramps were pretty severe and realizing what my body had just been through, I figured I’d respond to what I thought I really needed in terms of taking care of myself and being nice to my body, which had just been put through some mild trauma. Within an hour I was out of the bed, eating crackers and drinking Sprite to calm my stomach down.

The source of the bloating and cramping was soon revealed as the nurse informed me that they’d retrieved 52 eggs from my ovaries during the procedure. If 52 seems like a pretty high number, it should; even my nurse was surprised by it. While we’d been expecting—by follicle counts during the ultrasounds leading up to the retrieval—a fairly high count, 52 blew my expectations out of the water. And I felt really good knowing that my recipient couple would be receiving so many opportunities to create their family using my eggs. I was tired and sore and cramping, but I was also overjoyed. The work we’d all done: my recipient parents, the clinic staff with whom I’d worked so closely, the wonderful folks at Extraordinary Conceptions who buoyed my spirits and helped me navigate the sometimes-tricky legal world of anonymous egg donation, my support system—my boyfriend, colleagues and close friends, and my family—who’d shown me unflagging support and, of course, me, had culminated in the abundant prospects my recipient family would now have. I was fatigued and I was sore, but I was elated.

Fifteen minutes later I was going over my release instructions with my nurse and subsequently being wheeled out to the car. The ride back home, about an hour away, was probably the most uncomfortable part of the procedure: the jolts of the car going over manhole covers, moderate bumps and dips, and the like agitated my already sore abdomen. Next time, I’ll bring along a pillow for more cushioning on the way home.

Next time? You may be thinking. She’s willing to do this again? Oh yes, absolutely. The tradeoff is, for me, so favorable for all involved parties that it doesn’t make sense not to do it again, if I’m fortunate enough to be chosen to donate my eggs again. Certainly, egg donation isn’t a decision to be made lightly, and the process is designed to guarantee, to as great a degree as possible, the sincerity and devotion of both the donor and the recipient, or intended, parents, while protecting the legal rights of all involved parties. Egg donation is serious business: as a donor, you need to be prepared to attend a lot of medical appointments, especially in the couple of weeks prior to retrieval, to give yourself injections, even to undergo a minor surgery. Donors have an incredible responsibility to their recipients, and to themselves, throughout the donation process.

With this responsibility, however, comes immense satisfaction. The knowledge that you have contributed to the creation of a family that quite possibly would never exist without you is an understanding that can only come from going through a donation cycle, but the feelings of empathy, of gratitude, of hope for this family never fully leave you. The aftermath of both of my donations have left me with this understanding, and I know that if I’m fortunate enough to go through this experience again, I’ll feel the same way the next time around. The enormity of my contribution is immeasurable, as is the gratefulness I also feel for the role I have in helping this family.

That said, the donor fee is also, of course, appreciated, and is generally the impetus for most women to consider anonymous egg donation. The fee is great; it was the reason I listed with Extraordinary Conceptions in the first place and I certainly need the money. The incredible part of the donation experience, though, was what I received from the process that has been, for me, absolutely invaluable. You can’t put a price on helping a family, on fulfilling the dream of a couple, on giving a stranger the greatest gift they’ll ever receive. I hope that, for all of you prospective donors out there who are considering this experience, you can try to factor this into your decision, but there’s really no way of knowing until you actually go through with it. And boy, is it ever worth it.

It’s been about a week and a half since my retrieval, and my life has been back to its pre-donation normality for about the past week. On the day of the retrieval I went home and spent most of the day relaxing at home, although I did venture out for a very slow, very short walk in my pajama pants that evening. For the first few days afterwards I experienced some cramping and soreness, but by Sunday—my retrieval was on Friday—I went on a three-hour bike ride to run errands and enjoy the beautiful day and the end of the weekend. On Monday I was back to work, and by midweek I was back to routinely walking and bicycling everywhere. Keep in mind: this is not exactly Tour De France riding here; I ride a heavy cruiser bike and live in, fortunately, a small enough city that allows me to get pretty much anywhere by bike, but it was great to be active again, and so quickly. Just yesterday, ten days after my retrieval, I went rock climbing at one of my favorite crags near my home.

Throughout this process I’ve fond that a lot of people are really interested in egg donation, and have fielded a ton of questions about the process. So many, in fact, that I am currently creating a blog to address the egg donation process and experiences I’ve had, with the focus being a donor’s perspective on donation. I invite you to check it out if you’d like more information from my point of view, or if you’re just interested in the process from a donor’s standpoint. You can find it at http://eggingmeon.wordpress.com. You can also contact me directly at eggingmeon@gmail.com if you have any questions. I’d be happy to answer them to the best of my ability.
Extraordinary Conceptions doesn’t pay me to write these posts; this evolved from my regular communication with the staff at this agency and subsequent volunteering to contribute to the agency’s blog. That aid, I recommend this agency unequivocally; the staff manage to be brilliant and professional as well as warm, kind and cordial while working with clients undergoing some of the most stressful decisions of their lives. They’re a truly incredible group of individuals dedicated to helping families achieve their dreams, and they do it with incredible grace and skill. I admire and appreciate their work, and I’m sure the rest of their clients do as well.

In case you haven’t heard, escrow company Michael Charles Holding Company has shut its doors, affecting more that 30 Intended Parents and taking off with 1,000,000 in client trust funds. While MCHC stated on their website that they were licensed and bonded, it has now come to light that they might be neither. The FBI is investigating MCHC and if you have any information about MCHC or Surrogenesis, please contact Extraordinary Conceptions and we will get you in touch with Sterling Johnson, who is tirelessly working to see if any money can be recovered for all those affected. However, as Sterling pointed out, even if any money can be recovered, it will be too late to meet your immediate financial needs.

Tonya Collins, President and CEO of Surrogenesis, is also Agent for Service for Michael Charles Holding Company and it is unclear if she had an ownership interest in the company. However, we at Extraordinary Conceptions and others in the industry are extremely doubtful that Tonya will emerge from this heartbreaking mess as an inocent victim.

Please contact Mario Caballero, the Executive Director of Extraordinary Conceptions, at mario@extraconceptions.com, to speak to him about your cycle and the discount program for those affected by the Michael Charles Holding Company and Surrogenesis.

Our hearts go out to all those affected. Dreams have been shattered and that is not an understatement. Surrogates are left without insurance while pregnant as bills were not paid. Donors have been left without payment after undergoing weeks of shots and an egg retrieval. And Intended Parents have lost their life savings, and in some cases, money they don’t have as most have to borrow money to afford treatment.

For those looking to work with an agency, please be careful and choose wisely. Speak to therapists in the industry and IVF physicians. Get personal recommendations. Do not rely on information online. You do not know who is posting that information and why. Anyone can say anything about an agency, and you can bet that Tonya Collins and Surrogenesis had a lot of people saying great things about her and her agency.

He not only shows leadership in contacting the medical board, but also compassion as he urges all of us to give the children our support, as they are innocent.

I highly encourage you to read his full post as he covers the issues surrounding the pregnancy and birth of the octuplets thoroughly.

Today, most agencies and IVF centers that have their own in-house donor program keep detailed medical and biographical information on their donors. However, the industry is pressing for a national donor registry. I am a member of the American Bar Association’s section on Reproduction and the Law and I can tell you that at the last meeting this issue was discussed. It is not going to go away, but I do believe that rather than have the government control and run it, those in the industry should create and control the registry, as the article proposed, with a board of directors as well as guidelines.

If not, we could have a situation like the UK, where couples wait two years, or longer, for a sperm or egg donor because donors cannot receive compensation and cannot be anonymous. One UK woman was able to work with a donor from the United States, but only on apeal from the government and only because her husband has ties to the United States. 

I encourage you to read the article as it is in-depth, well-researched and proposes some solutions to this issue.

I met her this past fall in San Francisco at the American Society of Reproductive Medicine and she was every bit the woman I imagined her to be: supportive, caring, bright, passionate and compassionate. Her organization is not affiliated with any agency, including this one, and she and her organization are a wealth of information for those going through egg donation, no matter where you are in the process.

I tried an egg donation cycle (which failed because I needed a surrogate not a donor, but that’s a whole other story) and I remember going through the transfer conflicted about what to tell the child if he or she was born. My cycle was in 1999 and there was nowhere I could turn to for support or guidance, just like Marna. Now men and woman have an organization and a support system for their many questions and concerns — and a shoulder to cry on when they learn the news that they will need a donor to have their child.

If you are going through egg donation or even if you have already gone through the process, I encourage you to seek out Marna and become one of her friends at Parents Via Egg Donation.

Using pre-implantation genetic diagnosis (PDG), infertility specialist Dr. Paul Serhal was able to remove a cell from the developing embryo and test it for the gene mutation. Carrying this gene also means that the baby girl could have had a 50 percent increase in contracting ovarian cancer.

Click here for more on the first UK baby born free of BRCA1.